In the first month of a newborn’s life, parents are very much in the honeymoon stage. Every facial expression prompts hours of interpretation and analysis, and everything your new baby does is absolutely amazing. But all honeymoons must end, and it doesn’t take long for awe to morph into confusion.
It’s a tale as old as time; your 4-week-old baby is fussing at the breast, arching and curling themselves up, and sometimes seems downright miserable.
“What’ve they got to be upset about?” you wonder. “Nothing,” it turns out and yet they keep on displaying the same behaviour.
Such is the struggle of trying to decipher if your baby is in some sort of medical strife or just a bit of a diva and, sometimes, the answers you get from experts don’t help.
Common behaviours in newborn babies
Newborns cry for many reasons and whether they’re wet, hungry, uncomfortable, unsettled or ‘other’, there’s sometimes no way to distinguish the cause.
“Many mums are told that such behaviour means the baby has tongue tie, colic or reflux, and even a cow milk protein allergy.” – Dr Leon Levitt
It can be dangerous to jump to these diagnoses as they come with consequences, whether they be surgery (for tongue tie), remedies for reflux or colic, or dietary restrictions for food allergies. It is important to determine if any of these can be avoided before committing to potentially expensive treatments that may not even solve the issue.
What to do to get though the newborn stage
Here are 3 things you can do to get through this period of newborn development.
1. Get that baby a check-up!
Call your baby’s bluff and rule out any medical issues first. Generally, a 6 Week Baby Check will go over any and all questions, but if you are concerned about your baby’s health or development, always book in earlier.
Baby Steps is lucky enough to be home to GPs who not only specialise in babies, but in parents. Their experience in helping parents uniquely positions them from other health professionals, because on top of the strategies and techniques they share, they can relate to parents in a way that inspires confidence and reduces anxiety.
2. Newborn gains and weekly weigh-ins
We’re definitely not suggesting you weigh yourself weekly — but for newborns, it can be helpful. In the first few days after birth, babies often lose some weight (which is normal), but after that, a healthy gain is usually around 100 to 200 grams per week in the first three months. That’s the range many Lactation Consultants look for when tracking early growth.
If weighing your baby weekly brings back a weight gain within this ballpark figure, the news is good. As Dr Leon Levitt puts it, “babies that are gaining weight steadily are not ill.”
Other factors to keep in mind are if your baby is meeting their other developmental milestones, how much milk they are taking in and how much ‘output’ they are producing.
Pay attention to poo
During this time, you’ll be happy to see a lot of it, as a baby that produces a respectable amount is very unlikely to be undernourished.
3. Develop some strategies for coping with newborn behaviour
“A child in the first 6 weeks lives on a series of primitive inbuilt inherited reflexes only.” – Dr Leon Levitt
Dr Levitt calls crying “the unacknowledged reflex” and while you should still respond to it, it is not your responsibility to fix it. It is unclear why some newborns will scream the house down and others will simply squirm or grunt, but there’s nothing the baby can do about it, so there’s nothing you can do about it either.
Some one-month-olds may cry and fuss for an average of three hours a day. This reflexive crying peaks at about 6-8 weeks. For tips on how to handle this peak in auditory output, check out our blog post on the four components of newborn care.
Dr Leon Levitt also recommends the following, which can help with crying in newborns:
- Swaddle them – this may help them feel more secure
- Take them for a walk – movement can be beneficial
- White noise can work wonders – a fan or nature sounds on an app could be enough
- Reduce stimulation – loud noises and bright lights are sometimes too much (for anyone)
If none of these methods work (and it’s very likely that on some occasions, they won’t), the best you can do is remain calm, take a break (after putting bub in a safe place) and return once you feel a little more zen.
Things can only get better
You may be doing everything right for what is a really common problem and not seeing any results, but the thing to remember is that the problem (undefinable as it is) is temporary. While it’s tempting to jump at the offer to ‘fix’ a crying baby with diagnoses like colic, tongue tie or the like, the solutions will be irrelevant when, in 3 or 4 weeks, your newborn will likely have improved regardless.
Advice from Dr Leon Levitt
“The best advice I can give new parents is just to keep weighing your newborn weekly, making sure they’re still gaining weight at a good rate, and find some strategies to get through this temporary period. We’ll get there without drugs, and we’ll get there without operations.”
For more tips on getting through the newborn period, visit #DrLeon
